on an anniversary

the static of life has muted the noise of grief
time is powerful dulling the sharpness of your absence

more than missing you
i feel sorrow for what you have missed

and still the magnolias stain the ground
we celebrate the tulips with their festival

wishing on meteor showers
losing toes that won’t grow back

i can’t cry
the tears well and then the bells chime

i try to write to you to keep you informed
of course it’s just as much for myself

as if suddenly there was something
worth keeping track of

we’ve moved into the realm of the mundane
where the day to day calls our attention

we’re planning for the future you dreamed for us
working hard to make sure pride is not some empty promise

i want to grow old for the first time
just to prove that i can do it

your heartbeat sits on a shelf as a reminder
everything i do i do for you

the blooms are for you
on your tree on the front lawn

the spring is for you
when the sun returns from where you’ve gone

the future is for you
to carry on in your footsteps

the belief in all things yet to come is for you
may their possibility carry us into your afterlife